It's A Matter of Choice

When I heard the news of the Supreme Court ruling on same sex marriage yesterday, my mind went in a few different directions.  I watched and read as people expressed their opinion in different ways.  For the most part, those opinions were one side or the other, but handled in a respectful manner.  I do live a pretty sheltered life. I don't watch the news and even my social media settings are very conservative, so I'm sure there were disrespectful things flying around too.  As the day went on, my mind was filled with something that I feel compelled to blog about. This is in no way meant to sway or support one side or the other.  It is sincerely meant in all due respect to all.  It will contain some of the things I have chosen to believe in, but this is not about my beliefs or those particular choices.  It is about that dirty word......"choice".

As a child, our world is controlled by the choices of our parents.  What to wear, what to eat, where to go...we don't have a lot of say in the matter.  As we grow and as our parents teach and let go, we gain more and more say in those choices of life.  As a mom of young children, I was pretty happy and content with the principle of choice.......then my little ones became teenagers!!  My love for the principle of choice turned to hate very quickly. 

It is no secret that I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, (Mormon).  I choose to believe in the doctrine taught and I choose to teach that doctrine in my home.  I also choose to accept the Articles of Faith.  They are 13 statements written by Joseph Smith in the early days of the church when he was asked to summarize the basic beliefs of the Mormons.  The 11th Article of Faith states:

"We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may."

Everyone gets to choose what and how they believe.  Letting others around us make their own choices is a very hard, hard lesson to learn.  I suppose it's easy enough if those people are perfect strangers and their choices don't harm or injure or get in the way of my choices.  But when they are people in my life, people I have relationships with, it becomes very difficult.  

Here's where my own beliefs come in.  I believe the principle of choice is an eternal principle.  It existed before the world was created.  We, as spirits, were offered a choice.  We had to choose one side or the other.  Based on what I know and believe of those 2 choices, I am sure that all of us made the same choice.  We chose to come to an earth that was going to be prepared for us and gain mortal bodies.  The plan we chose involved learning and growing and continuing to make choices.  The other plan which was dismissed and never put into play, was a plan of force.  No one would have to make choices, no one would ever make any mistakes to learn from, no one would ever rejoice in their accomplishments.....we would just be on a single lane path with no detours and no options.  So that plan didn't happen and here we are.  So you see, the principle of choice is the driving force of everything! Adam and Eve were given 2 commandments in the Garden of Eden.  One... to multiply and replenish the earth, the other... to not partake of the fruit of knowledge of good and evil.  Those two commandments were conflicting and both could not be followed.  By not partaking of the fruit, they would remain in the Garden of Eden in an immortal state and not be able to procreate, therefore not fulfilling the commandment to multiply and replenish the earth.  With the commandment given to not eat the fruit, the Lord told them what would happen if they did eat.

17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.  (Genesis 2:17)

Meaning that if they ate the fruit, they would be made mortal, subject to all manner of mortal issues, including death.

Well, we know they did eat the fruit, and here we all are in a mortal world and the eternal principle of choice continues.  

The Mormon church made an official statement yesterday. So did the Catholic church and so did the Jewish, both strict orthodox and moderate orthodox.  While each statement very specifically states the strong stand that the doctrine outlined by the Lord and by their religious structure will not change....that a marriage is a sacred covenant and a union between a man and a woman.  Each statement also called for the respect of everyone in the choices they make.  I sincerely hope that the plea for respect and love is not overlooked by all the opinions and energy surrounding this.  I also hope and plead that my choices and beliefs will also be respected as I am allowed to believe and teach in my home as I choose. I read this in a Salt Lake newspaper yesterday:

“This is another historic day," Utah Democratic Party Chairman Peter Corroon said Friday. "Today's decision acknowledges what Utahns have always known — families come in all shapes and sizes, and each of them is worthy of respect and legal protections. In addition to recognizing the rights of the individual, we also recognize the rights of religious institutions to not be compelled to act against their beliefs."

Utah House Minority Leader Brian King, D-Salt Lake City, called the court's ruling a great thing.

"We know this has been a divisive issue, and we recognize that each individual has the right to their own moral and religious beliefs regarding same sex marriage," he said. "But we welcome this ruling because it makes clear that discrimination based on sexual orientation is not acceptable under the Constitution and that families of all types are entitled to protection under the law."

Does the ruling dictate what a religion can teach and not teach.....No.  Does the ruling change my beliefs.....No.  Does it change how I will worship on Sunday and conduct my life during the week.....No.  It would seem the ruling is about equality under the law.  I would hope that same legal system will protect my rights to enjoy and live my life as I choose.  I would hope it would also protect the rights of all religious organizations to teach and conduct their religious rites as set out by the God they worship.  

There are all kinds of choices we encounter.  Choice is a God given gift and an eternal principle.  Some choices by others cause harm to people and laws are needed to protect. Some choices are a matter of life style and do no harm. Laws are good to establish equality under that law. The choice to disrespect others and their own choices is also ours, but only hurts and serves no purpose. I trust that the equality will be shared and respected by all.

Getting to the Heart of Social Media

My mind is spinning and I can't sleep.  I just witnessed something on social media that has touched my heart and warms my soul.  I want to tell you about it.  But first, let me explore a topic that I have heard debated......is social media good or bad?  So what's your take on that?  Well here's mine.  It is neither good nor bad, it just is. Just like speaking is neither good nor bad.  It is a form of communication.  Sending letters is neither good nor bad, it is a form a communication.  Body language is neither good nor bad, simply a form of communication. Texting, social media, blogging, etc, neither good nor bad, just forms of communication.  What we do with any and all of those forms of communication and what they are used for is what defines it as good or bad, but not the medium of communication itself.  Communication, in any form, is necessary to the interactions we all need and crave on a daily basis.  I'm sure you've all been told something that was not kind in nature, maybe even directed to you personally.  Not a good feeling and can be very damaging to the soul, especially if continued over a period of time.  Does that make the medium of speaking words a bad thing that should be debated and even abolished???  Well you don't even have to answer that ridiculous question.  So why would we think that social media is bad or even to be debated.  It can be used for so much good as well as so much bad, simply depends on the source and the outcome.  I've seen posts and drama and private issues aired on social media that I didn't really want to see or read about.  You all know the kind of thing I'm talking about.  So I just click, "I don't want to see this post" and it goes away, at least from my view.....and that is all I care about.  I have it in my power to do that and I love it!  I wish I could click a button and make some of the hurtful things spoken directly go away that easily.  Then there is the good stuff.  We all have different opinions of what we consider good...but for me, something uplifting, worthwhile, helpful in strengthening my character, even light or humorous to make me laugh.  All good stuff. 

So here's the real story.  Tonight a friend was given a great gift of support and love from her circle of friends on social media.  With her permission, I'm sharing this with you.  My friend sales a product and I'm not going to mention what that product is here.  That's not the purpose of my blog post.  She had a goal to reach to win a cruise to Jamaica.  Well, let me just say she had given up on that goal.  She had a death in the family this month and just returned from an out of state trip to attend the funeral and other family matters concerning that death.  That and other challenges made her goal seem impossible to reach, as her attention was diverted elsewhere.  So what did I witness??  Today was the deadline. With about 8 hours to go, she was down about $1300.00.  Seemed impossible.....but not when social media was the medium to accomplish that goal.  Another friend of hers decided to help her out and started posting.  It took off from there.  In less than the 8 hours, it happened and as I sat glued to my computer screen watching and posting and pulling for her, I wasn't alone.  I simply jumped on the band wagon and the wagon was full....full of love, support and well wishes.  I really didn't know many of the names of the others on that wagon.  I could tell who was driving the wagon, and it wasn't her.  It was that other friend.  The joy and excitement of each person posting was evident.  I was part of something grand!  I'm sure the trip will be amazing with lots of memories.  But I would bet my friend will remember this night of support and love as each of us rallied around a cause.  

My friend has a huge heart and has found a way to give love to children that might not otherwise find love and peace in their life.  She offers foster care and loves these children.  She opens herself up to the possibility of pain along the way.  I've witnessed and experienced some of that from a different angle and have only respect and admiration for her.  She had a month that has brought sadness and grieving.  She deals with other trials and struggles, as we all do.  She may wonder how I even know that much about her.  Yup...social media, gotta love it!  This night wasn't about buying a product, although we will all get our product in the mail and use it and love it!  It was all about giving our mutual friend something she deserves because she gives so much to others! 

Is social media good or bad?  It just is.... and when used as I witnessed tonight...it is very, very good.